All posts by Little M.S. Runner

Forty-something, married with two kids and two dogs. Trying hard to live every day to the fullest with multiple sclerosis, impaired vision, and deafness. Couldn't make it without my Savior, Jesus Christ.
Cochlear implant, Deafness, Domestic Engineer, Family, Friends

Thursday Thoughts On “Normally” and Group Gatherings

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This week I had planned for things to return to “normal”, or a feeling of it at least. I’ll tell you how the week went and you can be the judge:

1) “Normally” I walk the kids to the bus stop. This week it was far too cold to make them walk, so Dad drove them on all but one day. (Walking through the snow really works those leg muscles!)

2) I “normally” eat breakfast, drink my coffee, and work on household chores after returning from the bus stop. This week I took a lot of back-to-bed “naps”, stretching my coffee and meals far into the afternoons.

3) I “normally” Skype with my mom every day. I was lucky to get in one conversation with her today (it was her birthday, so of course).

4) I “normally” have meals planned and grocery lists prepared for my husband every week. This week I had to throw it together at the last minute.

5) I “normally” feel like writing things that people want to read. Something about watching this puppy for “potty cues” keeps me on edge, and I haven’t felt any inspiration to write. I did write one paragraph for my book though. Actually, two, but the second one is only three words so it probably doesn’t count.

Oh, but tomorrow. I have a gang of girlfriends coming over to eat dinner and knit and crochet, and chat up a storm – though I know that won’t be like old times because I can only follow one person talking at a time. I’m excited to see everyone and am thrilled to be able to open up my home for this event. Even if I can’t follow all the conversations, it will be great to see everyone having a good time. Group gatherings are an area that I immediately started avoiding when I lost my hearing, so it has taken quite a bit of courage for me to step back into these situations. The fact that it’s in my home certainly helps, but also these are dear friends of mine who I know are sympathetic to my new challenges. I have wonderful friends.

So Friday night should be some good times. Saturday we have a belated family Christmas gathering, and Sunday I may possibly have a date with my husband. Then the kids have a couple full days and a half day off from school the next week. All that to say, “normally” is out the window. Forget normal, let’s just have fun!

Writing

I promise the book won’t be this boring

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“1/22/14: Housecleaning. So I did the dishes today, which mainly consisted of filling up the washer and running it. Then I wiped down all the counters. Then I took the stovetop apart and scrubbed it down. I didn’t find the missing rubber pad, but I did find some areas that needed more scrubbing. I used the green scrubby and the crumbs came right off. Then I wiped everything down again with the spray and paper towel. All nice and shiny. I may have missed some spots, but it’s much better than it was.”

Wow. I’m reading back through my journals from a year ago, in an effort to get inspiration and ideas for structuring the book I’m writing.

It’s not going so well.

There is a lot of mundane tedium mixed in, so filtering out the good stuff is proving more challenging than I had hoped. But once I get through reading everything I think I’ll be ready to form a thorough framework or outline for the book, and then I can just start writing. I hope, anyway. This is all very new to me. It’s very daunting, and I have numerous doubts that I can do this. But why not? Why not me? I’ve loved writing for as long as I can remember. This past year and a half life has thrown some major curveballs, and I’ve learned a great deal through all of it. So now I have something to write about. Something hopefully others will want to read. I just have to get the words out. One. Day. At. A. Time.

No, wait. You know what? Maybe I’m getting hung up on all this preparation – structure – outline crap. What if I just started writing? It’s worth a shot, right? Only this time I’ll leave out all the house cleaning details 😉

Family

Hot and cold and hot again

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Our furnace is working at the moment, but we’re keeping our fingers crossed. It had shut down again, so the men have been stuck in the basement tinkering with it for yet another day. Our friend, an expert in this subject, says it’s acting wonky, and he still isn’t confident that it will hold. We might end up having to replace the whole dern furnace. But, since it’s Saturday night, and suppliers for this kind of thing aren’t open, the only thing we can do is wait. So we are enjoying the balmy 68 degrees in our house right now, with our fingers crossed. Luke is sleeping in his boxers, I’m sitting in my recliner in shorts and a t-shirt, and the dog is no longer huddled desperately under Mike’s feet (instead she’s sprawled out near them).

At 10 pm I was remarking to Mike that I couldn’t believe it was only Saturday. It just feels like the longest weekend ever, and we still have a day to go. I’m just praying it’s a less stressful day. One can hope.

Family, Food

Lunch-No, Pee-No, School-No, Heat… YES!!

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First, let me tell you about the lunch I had planned to eat today. It’s something Mike came up with, and it’s super easy. It’s pasta (usually penne) with marinara sauce, Italian sausage, and green and red peppers, all topped with mozzarella and baked. Adding the peppers was Mike’s idea, and though it’s extra work, it’s totally worth it. The kids hate it, but It has become one of our favorite dinners. Mike buys fresh links of both spicy and mild sausage, so I make a spicy batch for him, and the rest is for me and the kids. We always have leftovers, which is part of the reward. So that’s what I was really excited about eating for lunch today. Only when I opened the container as I was walking toward the microwave, I dropped the whole damn thing on the floor. All of it. On the floor. And immediately after dropping the delicious pasta onto the floor, I dropped a big, fat f-bomb. You know the one. I try not to use it often, but situations like these call for it.

Now, onto the main topic of the day. It’s friggin’ cold in Michigan this week. I don’t mind the cold. I grew up here, it’s not a big deal. Unless, of course, your furnace dies as the sun is going down, and the cold starts invading your living space. Mike noticed the temperature on the thermostat was low and thought the air filter just needed to be changed, but upon further inspection discovered the problem was much more serious. From what he explained to me last night, it sounds like our house very possibly could have gone up in flames when he changed the filter. Thankfully it did not, but at midnight it was clear to him that something needed replacing, and would have to wait until the morning. So when we awoke this morning, the thermostat was down to 47 degrees, which only sounds chilly if you are referring to outdoor weather, but in your home it becomes quite a nuisance. We are used to 65. After an entire day of almost completely dismantling our furnace, Mike was able to get the parts he needed, and with the help of a friend managed to get it rebuilt. By 7 pm, we had heat. The temp is only up to 55 at the time of this writing, but it’s heading in the right direction.

As it turns out, the culprit was a heat exchange with two gaping holes in it. I know nothing of heat exchanges and furnaces, but Mike explained a bit and showed me the holes and they look scary dangerous. Those holes were potentially allowing harmful chemicals into the air we breathe. If that’s the case, I am so thankful that it’s fixed, and that nothing serious happened.

Oh, and this you will not believe. Surprisingly, on this crazy cold day surviving cooped up with blankets and space heaters, my dumb dog did not pee in the house. Not even once. She even led me to the back door a few times, waiting for me to let her out. We’ll see how she does tomorrow, but it’s a miracle, if you ask me!

So we are praising God for keeping us safe and providing us with the means to a solve a very serious issue with our furnace. And I am praising Him for helping my puppy hold her bladder.

Oh, and I just found out school is closed for my kids tomorrow. We’ve had sub-zero temperatures across the state all week, and it seems all the schools around us keeping calling snow days, but not us. No, we had to be the troopers. Well, it’s about time. The kids are already in bed so we’ll share the excitement with them in the morning.

That is all! Rest well and keep warm!!

Family

Dogs are dumb

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This puppy, who I thought was making good progress with potty training, peed in the house THREE times before 8 this morning. Like, between 7 and 8. If she’s going for a record she’s of to a good start.

Also, she’s bat-poop crazy. She was awake and whining at 4 this morning, three hours prior to the peeing marathon, but also not long after my husband had so graciously gotten out of bed to let her outside. But since he has a real job to go to, he woke me up to address the issue. Of course I didn’t have my ear on, and it was too dark to read lips, so I had to sort of guess that his forceful pointing towards the kitchen meant “get the dog!” (Note to self: assign the new family member an ASL name)

So between 4 and 5 I was up with Piper, trying to figure out what her deal was. Which basically involved supervising as she frantically sprinted around the living room, darting and barking at invisible foes.

She did calm down eventually, so I let her out one more time and put her back in her crate. This was at 4:45, and climbing back into a nice warm bed was heaven. Waking up again at 6:30 to get the kids ready for school was not. Every cell in my body was rejecting wakefulness. It’s a terrible feeling, but thankfully I will have plenty of time to make up for it during the day. Did I mention this puppy, crazy as she is, happens to be a skilled napper?

Happy napping, folks!

Decluttering, Food

A Saner Me

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The kids are off to school, hubby is at work, the puppy is sleeping at my feet, and I am sitting at the dining room table with a hot cup of fresh coffee and the whole day ahead of me.

I feel like I can breathe again.

It’s amazing how different things can look depending on your mood. I’ve had some pretty rough days these past couple of weeks. I’ve had the kids home with me but with the added challenge of a new puppy. There have been plenty of good  moments, yes, but there were also many moments I don’t care to remember. Moments I’m not proud of.

I am not one to make New Year Resolutions, but this year the timing worked in such a way that it made perfect sense to make one. So I resolved to stop the yelling. It’s only been five days, and I’ve failed a few times, but I have had victories as well. And the victories outweigh those few failures. Especially considering they are more recent, showing that I am making progress.

I thought breathing and counting was the secret to not losing my temper, but that proved to be ineffective. I think the problem runs deeper with me, and therefore requires a more extensive solution. I think the key is in changing my perceptions, my expectations, and learning how to pause and really relax. “So what if she pees? Clean it up and move on.” “The kids left their toys all over the couch? Calmly and firmly ask them to put them away.” If I practice these kinds of attitudes throughout the day, practice them in moments of calm, then they become second nature when the calm suddenly turns to chaos. The result? A saner me. One who deals with the issue at hand, rather than reacting to it.

So, here’s to a new beginning. A saner me. Go forth and be sane 🙂

Writing

Baby steps to a book.

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I posted the following message on my Facebook wall the day after Christmas. Just six days ago.

“Today I have officially started writing my book. Thank you, Staci, for passing that ‘rumor’ along to our buddy Lyle. Your confidence in me was motivation to get this girl’s butt in gear.”

Of course, not much has happened since then. Which frustrates me to my core. Because I am an unrealistic overachiever, and I set ridiculous standards for myself, not having thought them through. Of course writing a book is an enormous task. I don’t even really know where to start, but that’s mostly irrelevant at this point because –

Hello? Who has time to write a book with two kids home for Christmas break and a new puppy to housetrain??

Okay. Now that we have that cleared up. A book is in process. Baby steps. Or maybe very tiny itty-bitty steps until kids go back to school. Either way, there will be steps.

Family

Poop Emergency

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Kids were playing outside with dog, dog tripped girl, girl fell into poop. Hence, Poop Emergency. But girl is clean, dog is sleeping in crate, boy is playing video games downstairs, and mom is thinking of cracking open a beer to help find motivation to fold 4 loads of laundry.

Earlier today we had a contest to see who could scream the loudest. I won, of course, because I was the only one competing.

I feel like we’re surviving okay. No serious injuries, no fatal wounds. And did I mention beer? And laundry? Clock’s tickin’… gotta go. Make it a great one, bloggy folks!! 🙂