I’ve been sleeping late, as I tend to do in the winter months. I get up early to feed the dogs and see my daughter off to school, and then I usually head back to bed. Getting out of bed for that second time is significantly more difficult for me, and it takes a good amount of willpower to do it. Usually it’s my bladder that urges me up. Today it was the mental reminder that I needed to put a grocery order in for my daughter to pick up after school.
I got out of bed, put on my cochlear processors, and queued up a 90s music station to pep me up a little. The song that played first was R.E,M., “Everybody Hurts”. Not really the motivator I was looking for, but at least now I feel seen! Michael Stipe always gets me. If you know, you know.
Anyhoo, I’m up. Not super peppy, but I’m ready to work. Coffee in hand, I’m gonna go knock out that grocery list!
This week, I’m pretty sure *I* was the sleeping bear. I’m gonna warn you right here, this is more than a running post. I’m gonna detour and touch on family matters and a little on perimenopause. If you can’t handle that, please move along. Thank you very much. If you’re game, please continue.
Sunday – I slept 8 hours, 43 minutes the night before. Not a lot of activity. I think I went to church. Yes, yes I did and I went to Planet Fitness afterwards to use the hydromassage beds. That was needed. I was still in a lot of pain from last week.
Me and the husband, hanging out in the parking garage like a couple of dorks in love. Scene behind us overlooks Detroit: Little Caesar’s Arena, Ford Field, etc.
Monday – Slept 9 hours, 36 minutes. I had planned to do strength training but according to my records, I did not. I did take a wicked nap in the afternoon in preparation for taking our daughter to her first concert. She was going with a friend to see Pierce the Veil and Blink 182, and hubs and I had a dinner date while we waited. I got a little teary eyed seeing her walk off towards the venue, knowing how much this meant to her. It was a good day. My babies are growing up so fast (more on that to come).
Cornfield behind me, this is one of the dead-ends in my neighborhood. This was just after I hit 4 miles and I so badly wanted to quit early and go straight home.
Tuesday – Slept 7 hours, 44 minutes. Ran 5 miles with hills. We’ve got a couple gnarly hills around our neighborhood and I was very pleased to see that my lungs and legs are handling them much better! This is growth, and great progress. It can only get better from here, if I stay consistent with the strength and hill training.
Wednesday – Slept 10 hours, 30 minutes. Took my daughter to the doctor for a well child visit. She’s doing well. Very healthy. Could use some improvements in her diet, which I’m sure is true of most teenagers (she’s 14). Right after getting a mom-requested lecture from the doctor about getting more fruits and veggies into her diet, she stood up and a package of Little Debbie Zebra Cakes fell out of her pocket. And, thank you for making my point, my dear! It was quite comical.
Thursday – Slept 9 hours, 40 minutes. I guess I didn’t do any training on this day. Probably more napping. I know I did have a lot of family management stuff I was working on so that’s probably what took all my time and energy. That and we took my daughter (Zebra Cake girl) shopping for some back to school clothes. I don’t remember what time we got home but I remember going straight to bed.
Friday – Slept 10 hours, 13 minutes. More family management stuff most of the day. Fitbod workout, 58 minutes. Triceps, shoulders, chest and lower back.
Saturday – Went to bed just before 8 pm the night before, which put my total sleep at 11 hours and 37 minutes. I was so tired. I did wake up around 4 am, read a book for about 10 minutes before going back to sleep. Because why not? This has been the pattern, and I believe it’s why I can “sleep” so many hours and still be tired the next day. It’s not great. I am blaming hormones and perimenopause, and have plans to see my ob/gyn doctor about it, eventually.
I say eventually, because I’ve been super preoccupied with managing my family’s schedules and clerical needs lately. I have one teenager just about to start driving and the other one entering his senior year of high school. And yes, the older is fully capable of doing many things on his own, but he is still living here and still in school and can always use some guidance. That and many things still require parental approval because he’s under 18. I don’t talk about my kids much here mostly because they have become their own people and they don’t need mom blabbing about their lives. They have social media, if they want to blab about their lives they can. But I will say that I am super proud of both of them.
My son is growing and maturing so fast I can’t keep up. Between his sports, friendships, and various jobs, he moves through this house like a hurricane and I barely get a chance to sit down and have chats with him. But when I do, I’m always blown away at who he is becoming and I’m excited to see where he goes in life.
My daughter is almost the polar opposite of her brother. She is an introverted homebody, and we always know where she is. I suspect that may change when she starts driving and working, but I’m enjoying having her around while I can. We have the best conversations, and I love hearing how her mind works. She is confident in who she is and I love that. I wish I had that at her age.
As we look to starting another school year, I’m reflecting on how far we’ve come as a family. We’ve been through so many challenges over the years. What I am proud of is the fact that we fought through all of our challenges as a unit. When one of us was falling, the other three were around to catch them. We work together to support each other, lend a hand, and let each other know we are not alone. Sure, we argue from time to time but overall we know we are loved no matter what. I hope we never lose that.
And that concludes my weekly training/life update. I imagine once the kids are back in school I’ll put more effort into writing more frequently. But still, I make no promises.
“There is no doubt that it is around the family and the home that all the greatest virtues, the most dominating virtues of human, are created, strengthened and maintained.” ― Winston S. Churchill
I ran a 10k on Saturday that I only half-heartedly trained for, but I had a blast. The weather was threatening thunderstorms all week, so the days leading up to it I wasn’t sure whether to be excited or bummed or nervous. The whole time I waffled between all these emotions I was kicking myself for not securing a guide runner for myself. The race was in my hometown, and 100% on trails I’ve trained on with a friend, so I just didn’t think I would need a guide. But adding rain to the mix would change the game a bit. I can’t see puddles well, or fallen branches. Also, my cochlear implants are not waterproof, and I did not want to have to remove them and run completely deaf.
I reached out to Facebook the day before, for encouragement and advice. My Facebook friends did not disappoint. I made a plan to wear my waterproof rain hat, and bring ziploc baggies to hold my cochlear processors if the hat didn’t keep them dry. With everyone’s encouragement, and the added benefit of having my husband present for the entirety of the race, I felt confident that I could do this.
The morning of the race I had a dream I was running a half marathon, and I was killing it. Seriously kicking ass and having fun. So that was my mindset when my Garmin watch buzzed at 7:30 am. I opened my eyes and said to myself, let’s do this! I looked at the sky and the morning’s weather forecast and was pleased to see that they only expected rain up until 9 or so. No storms! I was pleased at that, for sure, but my stomach was still in knots. I was excited and nervous, as usual. My husband and I got in the truck to head to the race and I just kept focusing on my breathing, hoping to settle my stomach. As we pulled out of our neighborhood Led Zeppelin’s Kashmir came on the radio (one of my favorites) and Mike and I looked at each other with impish smiles. I said, “This is my good luck running song.” In my head I was saying “Let’s f**king go. You’ve got this.”
As predicted, it did rain for the first couple miles of the race but then it cleared up for the remainder. There are lots of wooden bridges on our local trails, and they can get pretty slick when they are wet, so I did a lot of walking on the bridges. I normally run with intermittent 30 second walk breaks, Jeff Galloway style (if you know, you know), and my Garmin watch alerts me with vibrations when it’s time to run or walk. The problem is that I didn’t verify my watch was on the correct setting before starting the race, and about a half mile into the race I realized I wasn’t getting my alerts. It was still on the walk setting. I was feeling pretty strong with the running though, and knew I would have to do all the walking over the bridges, so I decided to go with it. I would just run the whole thing, with the exception of walking on the bridges.
My last-minute strategy worked out wonderfully and I felt strong the whole race. My left leg was of course threatening to drag towards the end, but not in the way it has in the past. Certainly not as bad as the last 10k, where for the last mile I needed to maintain a constant clutch on my guide runner’s arm to keep from falling. That was the Rivertown 10k in April, and I forgot to post about it, but it was a really fun race. In spite of the leg trouble at the end. Shout out to my guide and friend Mandy for making that race way more awesome than it should have been.
I finished this race with both hands held high and a smile on my face. I searched the crowd for Mike but I couldn’t find him so I just walked unsteadily toward a clearing, and then kept walking sort of in circles to keep from falling. I was unsteady, for sure, but I was able to stay upright this time, without any assistance. I may be getting stronger, folks! As I completed a circle and was facing the finish line, I saw Mike walking towards me. He had been on the other side, so I had a 50/50 chance of seeing him, I guess. We hugged, and then walked over to the pavilion to get a banana and granola bar. A race employee came over and asked me how it went, and I blabbed that I think this was my new favorite race. And even now, I think that’s true. I know I can run those trails for free, but it’s a whole different experience when you are surrounded by other runners, you are cheering each other on, and you get a pretty sweet medal at the end.
And of course, a free banana.
Riding home post race with my medal and my favorite chauffeur, my husband Mike.
This week, again, did not go as planned. But I still made a lot of progress and I’m proud of myself for what I’ve accomplished over all these years of running. Over the past 10 years I’ve gone from barely walking to not only becoming a runner but also running ridiculously long distances. I’ve had to really bring the memories of my major MS relapses to mind in order to motivate myself to keep going, despite being unable to follow the plan to the letter. I tend to forget why I signed up for this marathon, why I committed to all this training. I wonder if I’ll be able to continue, if I’m physically capable. And then I get out there and run and I’m reminded of how strong I’ve become and how important this has become.
So here’s the recap.
Strength training: I did not have a chance to get to the gym for leg workouts, but I managed to get a lot of squats in at home in between scanning old documents. I’m on a decluttering kick since getting my hutch refurbished. Creativity wins!
Run #1: I ran on Monday, just a quick lap around the neighborhood. I went down every cul-de-sac and street, which turns out is a total distance of 2.24 miles. Handy information to have sometimes. When I returned home I hung out with the dogs on the deck, which they love. Our golden retriever, Punky, loves to lick all the salty sweat off my skin! I don’t let her, but she tries. Shown in the photo below, I was trying for a sweaty selfie but she was more interested in licking my face.
Run #2: Timing and weather and me not wanting to get out of bed early enough meant I was back on the treadmill. A planned 75 minutes for a total of 5.02 miles. On my last 10 minutes or so I decided to run through the walk interval. I was feeling strong and anxious to finish. The cool thing was that a song I had just added to my playlist that morning, Run Like a Rebel by The Score, came on just as I started my last interval. It gave me a boost of happy feelings so I finished the run on a good note.
Run #3: Welp. I was gonna run 20 miles. Really didn’t want to. My husband helped talk me up some and gladly offered to drop me off at the gym. I had learned you could change the timing on the treadmills, so I was hoping to run the whole 20 in one session, but found once I got there that you could change the timing, but the max was 99 minutes. Just like my treadmill at home. Oh well, at least they have better displays there. And way more fans blowing cool air.
I started, ran my first 99 minutes. Actually, they allow a five minute cool down, so I just sped the treadmill up and went for an even 100. Took a photo, marked my time, refilled my water bottle, pulled out my protein bar and an extra pack of gummy electrolytes, and started a second session. I started the second session feeling awesome, rocking out to my tunes, and made it 52 minutes. Out of nowhere it was as if a razor blade or sharp piece of plastic had magically appeared in my shoe. I had to stop immediately. For several embarrassing seconds I was wondering what had happened. Then it dawned on me… a blister had popped on the side of my middle toe. See, I’ve been running with my big toe buddy taped to my second toe. That buddy tape rubs against my middle toe. After 10.1 miles, I guess it was too much friction. I went to the locker rooms to inspect the damage, shoved some toilet paper in between my toes to cover the open wound, and walked gingerly back to the treadmill. I tried to walk, then slowly jog, but it was far too painful. After much internal deliberation, I decided I needed to call it quits. I called my husband to come pick me up and resolved to give my toe a break and get the miles in some other time. Again.
This time, however, I wasn’t quite as disappointed about missing the miles. Because I was paying attention to what I was actually able to do. I ran 10 miles Saturday and I still had life in me. I still had energy and strength available to keep running if it hadn’t been for the popped blister. And now I have something new to learn: how to prevent and care for blisters! Which is something I need to know. Because as my sister had shared with me (ironically, just the day before) something she heard on a running podcast: “Didn’t you think your feet were going to hurt?” Yes, yes they will. Deal with it and move on, sister. We’ve got more miles to go.
This week I ran 17.71 miles altogether. I also did a whole lot of squats, some good walking, and pulled a thigh muscle playing Pie Face (I startle way too easily). Total half marathon miles, 193. Full marathon miles, 161.98. Grand total full marathon miles to date: 354.98. We’re still moving forward folks! One step, one punch, one round at a time.
What you see pictured here is my renovated secretary hutch!! The whole of it is sage green and the interior is an off-white called “drop cloth”. The new handles are a rectangular brushed silver (I think). I removed the little drawers and bill holders from the interior because who needs bill holders anymore? I replaced it with a silver paper tray and drawer unit that I found on Amazon and I’m stoked that it fits absolutely perfectly. It’s almost like I knew what I was doing. I still have some lighting to put up inside the desk area and always a bit of tweaking here and there but I would say for the most part, it’s complete! It was done drying last Friday but I had to order my new desk organizer and the pad for my laptop so I waited to show y’all when those were in place. Since this photo was taken, my husband drilled a hole in the back so the cords are all hidden and out of the way.
When I’m not using the desk area, I’m still able to fold that flap up and access the three drawers underneath. The top two drawers hold all my running clothes and gear, and the bottom drawer holds some miscellaneous items, including all of the music CDs I am not willing to get rid of (yet? I don’t know). There’s also a small CD player in there so yes, I have the capability to listen to the CDs. They just still don’t sound the same as they did before I became deaf. So I don’t pull them out very often. But they are all still really important to me, probably even more than the books I’ve painfully discarded over the past ten years, and they don’t take up much space, so I’m keeping them for now.
I’m so excited to use this desk now. I was using it every single day already, but now I can breathe a lot better while using it. I had fallen in love with this hutch because of its functionality, but now I’ve fallen in love all over again because it’s a color and style that I chose.
So that’s the big reveal, folks. My newly renovated hutch. I have to give all the credit to my friend who suggested we do this, and did the bulk of the work. It looks and feels amazing.
Well, this week of training turned out to be quite interesting! I started off with a leisurely walk on Sunday and ended with a whopping 15 mile run on Friday.
My Sunday walk I saw three rabbits, and I got pictures but only one was halfway decent, so that’s what you have below. Along with a picture of yours truly, of course.
This bunny was nice enough to stand still for a photo!
Tuesday and Thursday I ran mostly up the main road and less around the neighborhood, so I didn’t see any more rabbits, but I did run into a neighbor walking with her daughter and her dog, so I stopped to chat for a bit. That was a nice cap to Thursday’s run!
Here’s me after successfully taking photos of the bunnies before they all ran away.
Now let’s talk about the long run. First of all, I had to run on Friday since we had plans on Saturday and Sunday. Secondly, I had planned to run outdoors but at 6 am Friday the forecast showed possible thunderstorms. I did not want to take the risk of getting caught in a storm, so I pivoted to running on the treadmill. I really dislike treadmill running but mostly because I get so hot. So for this run I put a box fan next to the treadmill and that made it a lot more tolerable. This week the long run called for 15 miles. My treadmill automatically resets after 99.99 minutes of activity (remember Y2K??) so I knew I was going to have to break it down into smaller increments, which actually helped mentally as well as logistically. Three sets of 5, no big deal!
It really wasn’t a big deal. I ran a strong and steady pace for most of the run. I listened to The Princess Bride audiobook for the first 10 miles (if you loved the movie, I highly recommend the book) and then listened to my 90s music station on Pandora for the last 5. The farthest distance I have run since training for my first marathon in 2021 is the half marathon, at 13.1 miles. So you can guess that my body really struggled after hitting 13 miles and I really had to fight to keep going for those last two. But, I finished, and I’m happy I did. Now I get two weeks of rest before the next long run, which will be 17 miles. Yikes!
I was so happy to have completed those miles but my body sure took a hit. I think I hadn’t consumed enough calories so I was struggling to get enough protein and carbs back in my system before showering and collapsing on the bed for a good nap. Also, I’m having considerable pain in my right foot, originating from my big toe which I’m confident I sprained during my half marathon training and a brief experiment I had with barefoot running. It only hurt for awhile after that experiment, but I believe 15 miles was sufficient enough to aggravate it again. So I’m doing all the things. Resting, Icing, Compression, Elevation. And praying that it heals quickly so I can continue with my training. If it’s not showing improvement by Monday I may call the doctor and see about getting it looked at. But I’ll cross that bridge when and if I get there.
By the way, it never did storm. I think we got a few sprinkles but no storms after all. I could have run outside, dang it! Oh well, maybe next time.
Almost forgot the mileage… This week I ran 25.11 miles for a subtotal of 97.39 miles since official marathon training started, and when you add it with my half marathon it comes to a whopping 290.39 miles. One. Step. At. A. Time.
I don’t know about you, but it’s a pretty normal occurrence for me to wake up in the morning with a song stuck in my head. The genre of these songs is all over the map. I was thinking today I should start keeping track of them. And then I thought maybe I would start sharing each day’s song here on the blog! Because some of you may be interested or amused. Right?! Right. Sure! Maybe there’s a poll coming down the line, because to be honest I’m wondering how many others share this affliction.
Disclaimer: I take no responsibility for these songs. They are completely random and often come out of nowhere. I do not choose them, they choose me.
So, would you like to hear today’s song? I shall dub this: Mel’s Morning Music! Today I woke up with the relentless “Move, b***h, get out the way…” I’m not sure where this came from, because it is not on an any of my playlists, I ASSURE YOU, but nonetheless, there it is. And it seemed appropriate especially as I had to climb over my dogs to get to the bathroom this morning.
I wonder what song I will wake up with tomorrow! I’ll keep you posted. Now tell me, do you ever wake up in the morning with music playing in your head? Please tell me I’m not the only one…
I drafted the following post back in 2017 and I think of the 30 drafts I have stashed over the years, this one still rings true. The good news is that through lots of intensive therapy I have come to find and embrace that self-awareness I was so lacking. I now have a strong sense of what I love and am getting pretty good at embracing it. I praise God every day for the healing He has accomplished in my life.
***** I sometimes notice the people around me, enjoying things, and it often seems foreign to me. How can they know what they love? It must be really great to have that self-awareness, and to embrace it.
I don’t know if I’m making any sense here, but whatever. All that was to say that lately I’ve been trying to make note of the things that make me smile from the inside, deep down in my soul.
1) Parades. I freaking love parades. I can’t not be giddy watching a parade go by. I think it began when I was introduced to Easter Parade by the girls I used to babysit for. Maybe.
2) Caramel corn. I can’t stop eating the stuff. I lament that any time good snacks come into our home they get eaten before I even realize they are here. Not the caramel corn. That’s all mine. I will wrestle you to the ground for it. And if it has nuts? I’m not afraid to send you to the hospital.
3) Paisley. This is not a new realization, of course. I know I love it, and have for decades, and everyone else knows it too. You could even say that for this list, this one was my first love. It makes my heart flutter. Every time.
4) Led Zeppelin. In particular, Over the Hills and Far Away… something about how it eases you in, seduces you for a minute and a half, and then comes in pounding with those drums. It just gets me every time. There are certainly many other songs to love, like Kashmir, Ocean, or D’yer Mak’er, but Over the Hills was I think what sold me on the band in the first place. And it didn’t hurt that I first started listening to them on vinyl.
5) Sunrises. The rising and setting of the sun are visually similar, and both beautiful, but somehow the rising sun is what really calms my spirit and whispers to my soul. When I am privileged to stop and see the sunrise, I am always, always reminded that the fact that I am here another day is an enormous gift. Oh, and coffee. You can really enjoy a good cup of coffee while staring into the sunrise. *****
I still love all those things and have added more since then. Sipping bourbon, writing, singing karaoke, dancing in my kitchen, listening to the mourning doves cooing in my backyard, tending to the lilies in my planters. Lots of simple things bring me joy. Things that have always been around but now I’m finally able to notice them and really enjoy them. I’m three seconds away from breaking into a Barbra Streisand song so I’ll stop here. Have a wonderful night, my friends. This week I challenge you to look for joy in the simple things.
Hi there! I was on a weekly roll there, posting stories and then…. hard stop. Sorry about that. I got stuck. To be honest, writing about old stories was getting a little, well… old. And not much has happened in the present that seems exciting enough to write about. My daily journals consist of a lot of mundane recaps and daily goals such as: laundry, groceries, nap, read, clean, etc. SUPER boring. But I still think about writing. All. The. Time. Because I am a writer. It’s who I am. I love writing. Always have. Probably always will. I just haven’t been writing anything here on the blog because I haven’t had anything I felt anyone would be interested in.
But awhile ago I stumbled on an old blog of mine (I’ve been blogging since 2003 on various platforms) and it was a lot of silly nonsense. I wrote because I enjoyed it, not because anyone was interested in it. And so I would love to get back to that. The not caring. Just writing because I enjoy it.
So I decided I want to share here a new genre of music I’ve come to love. Now, I have loved Bob Marley since I first heard him in high school, but that’s as far as I delved into reggae. However, this past summer my family and I took a cruise, stopping one day in Jamaica. Lounging in a pool of sapphire blue atop a lush green mountain overlooking the Caribbean Sea was extremely magical, but what I really fell in love with was the music. There was this energetic, positive, vibrant music blasting everywhere. And it makes my heart flutter when I hear it and I can’t help but sway and move to the rhythms. So several weeks back as I was trying to choose some music to get me through another session of folding laundry, I was reminded of Jamaica and searched for a reggae station. Y’all, it immediately brought me back to last summer and I couldn’t stop smiling. Or dancing! It makes housework so much more fun. Every one of you should try it. Really. Jot that down on your to do list. Then let me know what you think. I’ll wait…
Friends and family who know me know that I have always had a deep love for music. Music is what comforts me, inspires me, brings me joy. Music is my Happy Place. Not being able to hear music was a heartbreaking loss for me. However, in between the tinnitus and the silence, there was a song stuck in my head. What was so miraculous is that it wasn’t a well known song, or one I even remembered singing. This song, with lyrics inspired by Psalm 40, became my mantra. I sang it to myself, in my head mostly, but often when left alone I would hum it softly or belt it out in the shower. The lyrics were so perfect for what I was going through that I considered it my theme song.
Jesus, Lover of My Soul
Jesus, lover of my soul Jesus, I will never let you go You’ve taken me from the miry clay Set my feet upon the rock And now I know I love you I need you Though my world may fall I’ll never let you go My savior My closest friend I will worship you until the very end
Deaf and half-blind runner with multiple sclerosis
Little M.S. Runner 