Category Archives: Exercise

Disability, Domestic Engineer, Exercise, Faith, Family, Health, Hobbies, Running, Writing

Brain Dump – Winter Edition

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You guys. I’m neglecting this blog. I do apologize. I’ve been hiding. Hibernating a little. But still active! Just not feeling the urge to broadcast my life. I’m still making the super slow shift from “over-sharer” to “intentional storyteller”. Finding where I want to hold boundaries with my writing and the sharing of it with others.

Part of this hesitation with writing is that I am becoming more aware of the reasons I do things. Why do I write? Why do I blog? I’ve been blogging off and on for over 20 years, and I think for the majority of those years it was just to clear my head, share funny thoughts as they came. It was a great way to add some whimsy to my dull life working in offices and crunching numbers. It was FUN.

Until it wasn’t. When I became disabled in 2013, I considered dropping it altogether. Through a series of events and gentle Holy Spirit nudges, I felt called back to it. To share what I was going through as I adjusted to a new life. So I picked it back up and stayed with it happily until 2020, when the sh** hit the fan, as they say. My long term disability insurance representative had combed through my blog, my medical records, and notes from our phone calls, then twisted all my words and used them against me to cancel my monthly benefits.

I fought to regain those benefits and eventually won, but it took over a year. I was cautioned by my attorney to be careful what I put on social media, if anything at all. It was some time before I felt safe enough to return here, and I’m still a little gun-shy about everything I post.

All of that to say, I *want* to be here. I want to post updates on my life. I want to encourage others to never give up when life knocks you down. I’m just not super awesome at the consistency of it. But I’m working on it. I haven’t forgotten you!

So here’s a running update: I haven’t been doing any running because it’s cold and icy outside and I refuse to run in the basement on the treadmill. It’s depressing, okay? However, I’ve been keeping up with small daily exercises, thanks to an online group that helps keep me accountable. I have a 10k race I’m signed up for in mid-March, so I intend on picking back up with running after the holidays.

A Writing Update: I’ve been working a lot on my memoir, again. This time it feels like it’s actually going somewhere. I went down the rabbit hole of memoir training for a while there, but I did eventually land on a method that works for me and am excited to feel like I’m making real progress. Now that I have a structure and a plan, my intention going forward is to write 500 words per day. Yesterday was my first day and I wrote twice that amount, but I don’t expect that to be the norm. I almost finished a whole chapter and that was pretty exciting. I have a note above my desk that reminds me *not* to edit while writing, because I can’t be creative and critical at the same time. I joined a writing group that meets every weekday on Zoom, and I enjoy having that time and space to focus solely on the manuscript. I’ve only been going once a week so far, but if things slow down on the homefront I may try to join more often.

Other than that, I’m just blissfully busy with my husband and kids. Taking care of the home, preparing meals, keeping us all healthy. Super mundane stuff that we all take for granted, but that I am grateful to be able to do. What are you grateful for these days?

Exercise, Trauma, Writing

My relationship with writing

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I was listening to a podcast interview with an author awhile back. The author talked about her writing as a relationship, and that stuck with me. I feel similarly. I’ve always had a relationship to writing. A relationship *with* writing. Some days we are close, spending all our time together. Other days not so much. We haven’t been all that close the last few years. With all the running and trauma therapy, it sort of took a backseat. Sorry, Writing. I miss you!!

I am working to be more intentional in a couple areas of my life, and writing is at the top of the list. I am working on writing a book length memoir. I have talked about and considered it for years, but now I’m actually taking tiny baby steps every day, every week, to slowly move towards that goal. I have a small group of friends who have graciously agreed to receive regular updates. Sort of an accountability group, if you will. They are also great cheerleaders when I need the encouragement.

There have been lots of moments along this journey where I have needed encouragement. This is not an easy project I have taken on. First of all, the craft of writing is something I have zero training in. Second of all, I’m bumping into areas of yet unprocessed trauma as I am working to craft the story. So I’m having to go gently and that takes time. Third of all, I still have all the other areas of life I need to remember to give attention to!

I have a tendency to get a little obsessive with writing, and the side effect is that all other areas of life get shoved to the side. I’m working on that. I’m trying to stay intentional with fitness. Running and strength training, specifically. I talked to the staff at my gym today and have plans to sign up for weekly classes and meet with the personal trainer to go over my goals. Looking for more accountability. It’s a step.

So, full disclosure. I feel like my relationship with writing got a little dysfunctional, and this blog post is my step #1 to getting back to a normal, healthy (aka not obsessive) relationship with it. No more pouring over memoir methods, coaches, videos, books, podcasts, etc. I’m scaling WAY back on that, and am going to try to be intentional about blogging here again. Short blurbs, stories that pop into my head and beg to be put down in words. EVEN IF they aren’t well-written stories. I still want to tell them. That is what I feel like God has put on my heart and held there for the longest time. Months, years perhaps? He has given me a desire and I need to stop ignoring it. The nagging hasn’t stopped, so I might as well see what happens if I finally give in to it.

Oh! And so I don’t forget, I need to tell you about my recent trip to the Abbey with my sister. So if you don’t see that post come across in the next couple weeks, bug me will ya? I wrote half of it but need to finish it. Also, I’d love to tell you what I’ve been learning in the kitchen. I could talk all day about food but sometimes it’s harder to get it down in words. So there are lots of stories to come through here, if I do what I say I’m gonna do. Stay tuned. *Shalom, Mel*

Books, Exercise, Food, Hobbies, Photos, Running

New Shoes and Push-ups

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Fair warning: Today I’m gonna talk about running. I’m not obsessed or anything. It’s just a hobby I’ve become quite passionate about. Not an obsession. Seriously.

I get emails from our local running store about sales and new items. I recently received a notification that the particular model of running shoe I wear, Saucony Kinvara, were on sale. It had been many years since I had been fitted for shoes so I was more than overdue. Also, one of my current pair of running shoes (I rotate between 2 pair) has well over 300 miles on them and need to be retired.

My tiny left foot.

Now, I have been wearing a size 7.5 normal shoe, and an 8 in running shoes. It’s always good to go up half a size with running shoes because your feet swell. I ran for years in a 7.5 and it caused so many blisters. However, at this trip to the store they sized my feet and it turns out I am now an 8, but only the right foot. The left foot is a 6.5. I took pictures because I couldn’t believe this fact, but it’s true. I went home with a fresh pair of size 8.5 running shoes.

My new shoes, newly laced for maximum comfort

After getting some fresh orthotic inserts to accommodate my pronation, I was good to go. Or so I thought. I went on a long run last weekend and halfway through my run the top of my left foot was feeling some serious pain. Yikes. I’ve experienced this before. I forgot to relace my new shoes. See, there are different methods for lacing your shoes. If your shoes are hurting you – try changing up the lacing. It can make a world of difference. I’ve learned so much about this through trial and error and it’s quite fascinating. I always thought running was a simple sport. Just throw on some sneakers and go. Nope. There is so much more to it. But, I always love the learning, and seeing myself improve with every tweak in my training and gear.

Back in May I was part of a challenge to do 100 push-ups every day. I only joined because my sister said they could be any variation of push-ups in any increment. You could tailor it to fit your fitness level. So I did. I started out the month doing 10 countertop push-ups at a time, 10 times throughout the day. And when that got too easy I increased the number of reps and then moved to a lower surface. I finished the month being able to do 5 sets of 20 push-ups using my fireplace cabinet. When the month ended I vowed to continue the daily habit, and I’m now at 3 sets of 33 at the fireplace. I’m hoping to progress to using the ottoman, and eventually I want to be able to do your traditional on the floor push-ups.

The thing that has amazed me though, is that since doing this daily habit, my run pace has increased significantly, without much increased effort on my part. Also, I can sense that my core is stronger. I notice when I’m walking up and down my stairs that my balance is somewhat better. Now, none of this is concrete. I could just be imagining the improvements. Heck, maybe my Garmin is old and not accurately tracking my speed. I don’t know, but I do think the push-ups are helping in more ways than I had anticipated. And it always feels good to feel stronger.

I have been training for a 10k at the end of this month, and am really hoping to be able to beat my 10k PR that I set in 2020, when I ran a virtual race with my sister. I’ve run several 10ks since, and none of them have been close to catching that time of 1 hour, 18 minutes, so I’m trying to keep my expectations realistic. But I do think this core strengthening with my daily push-ups will help. Fingers crossed!

That is all for now. I still have some books to recap (I think?) and I’m working steadily on writing my memoir, so like I said I’m not obsessed with the running. Just passionate. Reading and writing help to keep me balanced. Oh, and food. I think it’s time for lunch 🙂

Bible Study Fellowship, Books, Coffee, Daily Snippets, Disability, Exercise, Faith, Family, Friends, Writing

Long and Rambling, perhaps

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Oh my word, friends. I joined a challenge to do 100 push ups every day in the month of May. My sister does these challenges with a Facebook group and they have always fascinated and tempted me, but this one grabbed me because she said you could do modified versions, and you could space them out in any increment, so I thought what the hell, let’s give it a shot! I have always had super weak arms and would love to get stronger so this is proving to be good motivation. We are eight days in and I have come to love the countertop pushup. It seems to be the perfect level of challenge for me. I can’t do the 100 all at once, but even in this short number of days, my endurance is already improving.

Today I decided to head back to the gym for some elliptical time and a full body circuit workout. The bonus? A hydromassage to finish it off. The hydromassage beds at Planet Fitness are 10 minutes of pure relaxation. My muscles are thanking me.

A short walk down the street and I’m parked at the coffee shop enjoying a large Americano. I was feeling so sluggish all morning and I think it was the lack of caffeine. I really had to push through that workout at the gym. It ain’t easy folks, but it’s worth it.

The interesting thing about this morning was that I was feeling really tired, but not fatigued. It was your classic – not enough sleep, not enough caffeine, wanna go back to bed – tired. I was feeling sluggish and borderline grumpy. It was refreshing in a weird way, to feel something like “normal”. Like how I used to feel sometimes on Monday mornings, heading into the office to work. A lifetime ago.

You could say I’m still working on accepting the loss of that life. It comes in bits and pieces. I am so grateful for where I am and how God has blessed me through disability. I am able to spend days like today at the coffee shop while my husband goes to work. But there are still parts of that life I long for. I’ll always long for independence. It’s just that these days it’s a muted longing, and I’m not nearly as angry about it as I used to be.

My desire to write more is coming back. A long time ago I was introduced to a memoir coach, Wendy Dale. She does paid coaching, but she also offers free coaching on YouTube videos. I had watched all the videos and was impressed with her knowledge. She was somehow able to deliver all this info in a simple and straightforward way. I was intrigued, and thought I was going to really get going at writing more, but life sort of pushed it to the side. I was more focused on my family and running than writing. And if I’m honest, that’s probably still true. Our son, our firstborn, is graduating from high school any minute now and will be off to college in the fall. You can imagine the mental load. Also, I’m working to get back into running, because I took too big of a break over the winter and my health and energy levels took that hit pretty hard. But back to Wendy. She recently published a book, “The Memoir Engineering System”, so of course I had to read it. It was all this lovely knowledge of hers, all compiled in one place. I purchased the Kindle version and devoured it in a few short days. It will be my guide book for when I am actually ready to write that book, but for now it’s all just rolling around in my head. You guys, I have so much rolling around in my head, you have no idea. Well, you have some idea because I like to ramble on here on the blog. I mean, that’s kinda what it’s here for. To help me declutter my mind. You’re welcome.

What else? I’m still reading a lot. Watching a lot of Criminal Minds reruns. Just finished up another year of BSF (Bible Study Fellowship). We studied the book of Revelation this year. In my 40 years as a Christ follower I had never read Revelation so I was a little apprehensive about it. It went well though. I had a great discussion group. Very diverse, and as my friend Cynthia noted at Share Day yesterday, full of alpha women. It was terrific. I don’t know how it is at other locations, but our BSF here in my city does a very good job at running this program. It’s always a safe space. Some days the passages we are reading are really difficult, and I have always loved that questions are welcomed and encouraged. We don’t always walk away with the answers – almost never, to be honest – but we walk away with a broader perspective and insight. I’ll miss my BSF ladies over the summer but I look forward to seeing them again in the fall!

I think that’s the bulk of my rambling updates, for now. My coffee needs my attention. Have a beautiful day, my friends.

Cochlear implant, Exercise, Family, Food, Health, Kids, Photos, Running, Stories

Goals, and a bit of honesty

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So. For the month of March I had attempted to go without sugar. The processed stuff of course; I did not abstain from eating fruit. Girl needs her fiber, you know? I made it 3 weeks, and here’s why. It really didn’t seem to make that big of a difference! I had been warned that I would go through a brief period of withdrawal, headaches, mood swings, etc. I had none of that. I expected to lose some weight. That didn’t happen either. My conclusion? Maybe I don’t really eat that much sugar. So after 3 weeks of this mild deprivation, I gave up the experiment. And again, nothing really changed. The only thing I really learned is to be more aware of what foods contain added sugars and how much. And I will continue to try and avoid those things as much as possible, but I don’t think I’ll go completely cold turkey again. I love donuts too much.

My new goal, for the month of April, is to complete some sort of exercise every single day. I’m 5 days in, and I’ve only missed one day, but I got right back on track the next day. This missed day was Friday. I just couldn’t will myself to do anything, I was so tired. However, upon reflection I realized the reason I was so tired was because on Thursday I went for a run during the day, and that night I went swing dancing and then to karaoke. So couple a late night with two forms of exercise, and I think I earned that pass for Friday. It’s my game, so I’m going to allow it. Moving on.

Today I ran two miles to the convenience store to buy myself a belated birthday donut (my birthday was in March, the no sugar month, which in hindsight was not very well thought out). While on the way I decided I would also buy donuts for my kids and then just walk the 2 miles back. I did not feel like running while holding a bag of donuts. So I completed 4 miles, half running, half walking. Decent workout. My legs will thank me tomorrow. And the kids were pleasantly surprised about the treats.

So, I need to be real honest here. I went most of the winter without much running. I didn’t do much strength training either. However, I have been slowly starting to get back to the gym for strength training, and I occasionally get out there for a run. Michigan has really been struggling to let spring in, because even when the temps are reasonable, the wind brings them right back down. One, I don’t like wind because my cochlear implants make it extremely loud and that’s just annoying. Two, it’s cold man!! Running helps my body warm up in most places, but my face and fingers and toes still end up chilled to the bone and it just makes me grumpy. It does not make for enjoyable running. Of course, I’m still grateful to be able to run but I seem to remember having more joy with it, and I can’t seem to find that yet. I need a race on my calendar to get excited about. I’m working on it. All my runs have been short, 2-3 miles, and that doesn’t really get me out of my neighborhood. I want to be free! I want to explore the trails! Get me away from the road, I want to run by some people walking their adorable dogs! I’m reminiscing my marathon training days, and longing for that feeling again. Not that I have plans to run another marathon anytime soon. A half, maybe. We’ll see. I definitely want to do more 5ks and 10ks, but only if they involve fun swag. I’ll never win these races, and I can run at home for free, so good swag is a must for me.

So yeah, goals. Limiting sugar and exercising regularly are two things I’ve really been working at to keep myself as healthy as possible. It’s what I’ve gotta do to fight disease progression, and I think it’s going pretty well. Most days I feel pretty good. I still tire super quickly and take a long time to recover, but at least I’m having those moments where I’m able to be more present with the people I love. These are good things. While I’ll never say I’m thankful to have M.S., I’m always grateful for what I’ve learned from the challenges it throws at me every day.

Daily Snippets, Deep thoughts, Exercise, Faith, Food, God speaks, Health, Multiple Sclerosis

Hibernation

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Okay, as I’m reviewing my new list of habits, I’m rethinking one, and that’s daily exercise. Let me explain. I know it’s good for me, I know it helps my energy levels. BUT – when it’s on my list to be done daily, and I don’t do it for whatever reason? I place guilt on myself, and that’s a crummy feeling. When I reviewed my habit list this morning, they all looked positive and worth doing except when it came to “exercise”. I almost cringed at it. Ew. It’s cold outside, my body hurts, and I have so much cleaning and decluttering I need to get done inside my house. And then I started thinking about bears.

Well, not right at first. I started thinking about the cold, and the season of winter, and then the animals that hibernate over the winter. Like bears! Bears hibernate in the winter, right? It’s a fascinating process they go through, and when they are preparing for the long hibernation, after they’ve consumed all the food and water they can find, they become increasingly lethargic and rest for almost 22 hours per day (source: https://bear.org/bear-facts/5-stages-of-activity-and-hibernation/). I’m fascinated by this and found myself going down a bit of a rabbit hole to learn more but that’s not your concern. The point I was coming to is that bears go through a season of hibernation, of excessive rest and that’s just part of their life. They aren’t waking up in the spring and saying to each other, “man, I feel like such a lazy bum, I’ve done absolutely nothing for the last three months.” No, they just get up, stretch their legs, and move on to the next phase.

Now I’m thinking, why can’t that be true for me? I realize that bears do it for very good reason. They don’t live in heated homes or have ways to store food and water for later. It’s a survival mechanism, and it works for them. But I’m also not talking about preparing for 100% hibernation. I’m still human, after all. I’m just saying maybe I need to be kinder on myself, knowing that my body has a much harder time during these colder months, and maybe an extended rest may be good for it? It’s worth a shot, right?

I’m just thinking out loud here so forgive my rambling thoughts. I think what it really comes down to is that I’m trying to be more mindful of how I spend my time each day. I’m trying to be intentional with my minutes, and I’m trying to stay more tuned in to where the Holy Spirit might be leading me. And I feel like He is telling me to give myself a break in this area, at least for a season. It scares me a bit. I wonder if this is just a deeply rooted part of me making elaborate excuses. Or what if I go too long without running or strength training and I never get back to it? And why am I posting this here on the blog? Wouldn’t this be better kept to myself in a personal journal? Maybe. Or maybe someone needs to hear this, that I struggle with creating and keeping good habits, and my thoughts go to weird places like hibernating bears. I don’t know. Maybe I’m just feeling a little bit of courage to let you in on my mental processing today.

The conclusion I’m coming to is that I’m removing daily exercise from my habit list, for this season. I will still try to stay active, in and around my house, but I’m no longer making it a “rule”. When my body says rest, I’ll rest. When it says go slow, I’ll go slow. And if it says move, I believe I’ll be ready to move! Now this mama bear is off to roast some pecans 😉

Coffee, Daily Snippets, Disability, Exercise, Faith, God speaks, Multiple Sclerosis, Prayer, Writing

Habit Reset

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Hey! We are officially on Christmas break! That means I can sleep in a little. Sleeping in was a lot more fun when I was younger. These days I tend to still wake up fairly early, and in pain so that staying in bed is not enjoyable. So I get up, make my coffee, get my mental work done, and then, depending on how I’m feeling, go back to bed for a morning nap.

I had a good morning at church today. God and I are working on some things. He’s tugging at my heart and helping me to let go of some of my idols. Getting back into a healthier routine. Every day is an opportunity for a fresh start. Today was that for me. A reset, for sure. My fluctuating hormones and energy levels have really made it hard for me to feel balanced, and I think that by getting back to some basic daily routines, I will start to feel more steady.

The routines I’m trying to work back into my daily life include drinking 64 ounces of water, reading, spending time in prayer and Bible study, and exercise. The idols I’m working to eliminate are binge watching television and the coloring app on my phone (which has since been removed… again.). These two things are not only big time sucks, but they aren’t great for my mental health and clarity. They’ve got to go.

Daily exercise may be my biggest challenge. I don’t have much energy these days, so it’s a matter of talking myself into it. Every day. The vicious cycle is that the less I exercise, the more my energy levels drop, and the more my energy drops, the less likely I am to exercise. So I just need to resolve to do it. And that is starting tomorrow.

I also want to get my writing mojo back; I miss it. I am journaling daily, so I am still writing. I don’t think that will ever change with me. I’ve journaled since I could hold a crayon. But part of getting that mojo back is why I’m posting more here, even if it’s mindless drivel. I’m hoping to write more content that I can be excited about. Writing wakes up parts of my soul that have gone dormant, but it takes a bit of work sometimes to chip away at the crusty covered up parts.

So that is what I’ve been hammering out today, new habits. Writing, reading, hydrating, praying, studying, and exercising. Hoping for the start of a new phase. I’m getting really bored of the current one. So here’s to new days and new habits. Until next time, shalom!

Coffee, Daily Snippets, Driving, Exercise, Family, Friends, Holidays, Kids, Piper, Punky

Daily Post #3 – December 7, 2024

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Long and crazy day. The original plan was for the whole family to go pick out and cut down this year’s Christmas tree. And that was going to be it, a nice relaxing day.

We ended up doing a lot more than that. To start off, a friend texted first thing in the morning inviting me to join her at the gym. I said absolutely yes, since I had missed the day before and had been itching to go back. I got reacquainted with the elliptical – I hadn’t used one in over 15 years, when I was pregnant with my daughter – and learned very quickly that the elliptical is an efficient way to work out the upper leg muscles. OOF! I’ll definitely be coming back to those. Then, with jell-o legs we went over to the 30 minute circuit and got full body strength workouts in. I was so exhausted after but it felt really good to be moving my body again. And, it’s a nice change-up from running, which can get dull at times. We finished at the gym with chair massages and then went for coffee to do some real catching up. It was a fine morning.

L to R: Mike, Luke, Natalie (leading our golden retriever, Punky) walking toward the trees to search for the one we’ll take home.

Once home and showered, I went with Mike and the kids – and Punky! – to pick out our Christmas tree. That was a blast, as always. It’s a nice tradition we’ve kept through the years and I will miss it when it’s gone.

Natalie kneeling in the snow with our golden retriever, Punky.

So with the tree procured and placed in the living room, we decided to head back out for a special mission. My daughter’s cell phone was broken and needing replacement. Since we all have had our phones awhile and are outside of the contract, we figured now we be a good time to shop for new cell phones/plans. So we spent the entire afternoon driving to various service centers, price shopping. We finally settled on one, and tried to get it all set up, but ran into a snafu so we’re hoping to get that completed in the next day or so. Oddly enough, none of us got frustrated with each other during this whole ordeal. We actually just enjoyed hanging out together. I was extremely grateful for that. And!! For a good portion of the outing my daughter drove! She just recently got her learner’s permit so she’s learning. She kind of hates it, it really stresses her out, but I think she’s doing a great job and will hate it less as she gets more practice.

All in all, it was a pretty incredible day and I’m so thankful for my friends and family, and thankful to have a warm bed to come home to. I’ll be sleeping well tonight.

Anxiety, Disability, Exercise, Low vision, Multiple Sclerosis, Partial Blindness, Visually Impaired

Good Day

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Some days we get to feel like we are winning. Not that there’s any type of contest, or reward for this “winning”. I mean the kind of day where you know you’ll be going to bed pleased that you were able to accomplish what you set out to do.

Today sort of feels like that, and I’m rereading that statement above and cringing at how pretentious it sounds. All I’m really trying to say is I’m proud of myself. And I don’t always feel that way, so it feels worth mentioning. Today I went to the gym and tried the 30 minute circuit that I had been wanting to try but had been too self-conscious to do. I was just nervous that i wouldn’t be able to see the numbers or instructions and that people would see me fumbling around or staring so long at the signs and would laugh at me. But I did it anyway! And it seems I started a trend because when I entered the room, I was alone. By the time I finished the circuit, several more people had joined in. When you finally do something that you had been avoiding for so long for fear of being laughed at, it’s a pretty incredible feeling of accomplishment. To be bold and confident when you don’t normally perceive yourself that way? Definitely feels like winning. The feeling is the reward.

Also, and this will hopefully be addressed in a later post, I traveled with my white cane today and I have to make an observation. The city bus drivers are a lot more patient with you when they know you have a disability. I found that when I have the white cane out in sight, they actually wait for me to be seated before they start moving again. I definitely appreciate that. I have so much more to say about this topic but the story is still working itself out, so it will be awhile before I can fully report on it. Stay tuned for that!

Books, Coffee, Disability, Domestic Engineer, Exercise, Faith, Family, Food, Friends, God speaks, Health, Kids, Marriage, Stories

My very brief “75 Hard” journey and what I learned

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I don’t know if any of you have heard of “75 Hard” but it’s this bazonkers challenge that some guy made up a few years ago, and it seems to have quite the following.

The challenge is this: For 75 consecutive days you must complete the following tasks:
1) Drink one gallon of water
2) Follow a diet of your choosing, no cheat days!
3) Read 10 pages of a nonfiction book
4) Complete two non-consecutive 45-minute workouts, 1 of which must be outdoors
5) Take a progress picture

If you miss any of the tasks even once, you have to start all over again on Day One. Oof.

A good friend of mine completed this challenge a couple years ago, and she is now working the challenge once again. When she did it the first time, I seriously gave it some thought but never did anything with it. This second time I felt compelled to hop on and give it a shot.

Now a couple of these things were easy for me. I have been intermittent fasting since March of 2023 so following a diet wasn’t a big deal. I would just be more intentional about sticking with my chosen eating and fasting “windows”. No problem.

Reading 10 pages of nonfiction? I’m a huge reader, and 90% of what I enjoy reading is nonfiction. Again, no problem.

Taking a progress picture is a simple enough task, and thankfully no one would have to see it but me, so the trick was just to remember to do it. Easy peasy.

It’s the gallon of water and 2 daily exercises that were the real challenge for me. I don’t mind drinking water, but I prefer coffee, and that doesn’t count. So I just had to be intentional about sipping from and refilling my water bottle throughout the day. I even bought myself a larger bottle (half gallon) so I would only need to refill once during the day. However, since I had just been coming off training for the Sleeping Bear half marathon, I was already in the habit of daily hydrating so this wasn’t a huge deal.

For the exercising I was doing an outdoor walk and indoor Fitbod workout each day. That was going very well, and with all the water I was drinking, my muscles were recovering well every day. I would feel a bit of soreness but it never stuck around for long. I was feeling really good!

Y’all, I lasted 8 days. That 9th day I had a super busy day morning to night. Doctor appointment for me, orthodontist for both kids, and having to use paratransit to get everywhere means every trip takes awhile and has zero flexibility. But that wasn’t what killed the challenge for me. I had been out of town the weekend prior and the day before I came back, my husband left for a 3 day work trip. So on that bonkers day with all the appointments, that evening I just wanted to spend time with my husband. I had to make a decision – stay home and complete my workouts (because all the appointments prevented me from getting them done earlier) or ride with my husband to take our daughter to her horse riding lesson. I chose the latter, ending my 75 Hard challenge streak, and I have no regrets.

I may try again some other time, but I don’t know. I strongly felt like God had been leading me to that challenge, so I had to really ponder why. I think He was trying to show me how much my daily life had been lacking in discipline. And while 75 Hard was very much an all or nothing thing, installing discipline into your life doesn’t have to be that way. The key is to be intentional. So now I’ve been thinking a lot more about how I can maintain that intentionality but in a way that fits with my impairments and my daily life. I’m being humbled here. I need to cut out a lot of things in my life for awhile that were distracting me. I would spend hours on Facebook or Netflix or the stupid coloring app on my phone, and before I knew it, I had lost most of the day. Since I’m not working, I don’t have anyone telling me what or when things need to be done. I am the boss of my life, and I had been doing a shoddy job of it.

So I decided to make my own list:
1) Read 10 pages of a book
2) Exercise for 30 minutes
3) Drink a half gallon of water
4) Pray/study the Bible for 30 minutes
5) Write for 30 minutes

The times listed are just minimums of course. I just list them that way so I have measurable goals. I found a habit tracking app so I can keep the list in front of me and check things off as I go. It will be satisfying to see streaks of habits, but I’m allowing myself the ability to skip days if necessary. Some days my body and mind need rest, and I’m going to honor that. But I’m working really hard to not slip back into bad habits. While binging on Netflix seems like it would be restful, it’s really not. And it’s discouraging when you come off of a session of 6 episodes of Reba and realize you’ve lost your whole day, and you still need to put away that laundry you washed last Tuesday, and you have no idea what you are going to feed your people for dinner.

So yeah. I’m working on some healthy habits. I was gonna say “new” healthy habits, but then caught myself. These are not new. I’m working on some healthy habits – again. And I should say, it feels pretty damn good.

Moving forward!