Category Archives: Decluttering

Decluttering, Domestic Engineer, Housekeeping, Kids

Conquering the hoarding addiction?

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Oh boy. We’ve been having a fun summer break so far, but it hasn’t been all play. I’m enforcing the “No Screentime Until” rules, most days, and it’s working fairly well. Luke has embraced it, because he is my child, and loves following a list. Natalie, on the other hand, moans and groans at it. Every. Single. Time. But I do realize she is only 5 years old, so I have lower expectations for her. The success with Luke more than makes up for it.

Here’s the thing… I am a recovering hoarder and I’m fairly certain that the tendency for hoarding is genetic. I have unfortunately passed this on to my children, and I am on a mission to reverse the effects and teach my kids early on to overcome it. So far this summer we’ve accomplished some MAJOR de-cluttering in this house. It’s been primarily in the kids’ rooms, but I’ve done my share in other areas too.

Last week we took everything out of Luke’s room and dumped it all on the living room rug. Then we cleaned his room and rearranged some furniture (at his request). Then Luke went through everything that was out in the living room, deciding what he wanted to keep and what he wanted to get rid of, keeping in mind that he could only keep what would fit comfortably back in his room. This was a huge job, folks, but he loved seeing the transformation in his room. And now he has easy access to the toys he uses most, and it’s so much easier for him to keep his room clean. He recognizes this new reality very clearly, which I think at age 8 is no small miracle.

The process worked so well for Luke,  a couple days later I tried it with Natalie. Did I mention she’s 5? Yeah, it didn’t go nearly as well with her, because as soon as she spotted a toy she hadn’t seen in awhile, she immediately wanted to play with it. So while she played, I sorted through her things, trashing obvious junk and sorting the rest into categories. She does well with categories, and does a decent job of keeping similar things together. I still have a few tubs/baskets of Natalie’s things to sort and organize, but we will get to it. Eventually. I’m just happy right now to be able to walk through her room to kiss her goodnight.

When all was said and done, we were able to donate a trunk full of toys to the kids’ pre-school, and several bags of clothing and assorted toys to the local recycling service (to be re-used). I am so proud of both of the kids, but especially Luke. He and I are so similar in so many ways, so I understand his struggles with keeping his room neat and parting with cherished items. I still remember my bedroom from high school days – it was a disaster – and I do not want him growing up with the same terrible habits.

I am 37 and have yet to really conquer my hoarding habits. I have come a long way, yes, but I still feel like I’m managing. They say an addict is always an addict, even if they’ve managed to stay clean (figuratively AND literally, in this case). The temptation and draw is always there. But these kids, they are still young, and they are still forming habits. Now is the time to instill the good habits, so that they grow up to be adults who will naturally pick up after themselves and say no to buying things they don’t need or have space for. Sound too neurotic? Maybe. But this is important, people! I am doing this for their future roommates and spouses! Someday, someone will thank me!!

Decluttering, Food

A Saner Me

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The kids are off to school, hubby is at work, the puppy is sleeping at my feet, and I am sitting at the dining room table with a hot cup of fresh coffee and the whole day ahead of me.

I feel like I can breathe again.

It’s amazing how different things can look depending on your mood. I’ve had some pretty rough days these past couple of weeks. I’ve had the kids home with me but with the added challenge of a new puppy. There have been plenty of good  moments, yes, but there were also many moments I don’t care to remember. Moments I’m not proud of.

I am not one to make New Year Resolutions, but this year the timing worked in such a way that it made perfect sense to make one. So I resolved to stop the yelling. It’s only been five days, and I’ve failed a few times, but I have had victories as well. And the victories outweigh those few failures. Especially considering they are more recent, showing that I am making progress.

I thought breathing and counting was the secret to not losing my temper, but that proved to be ineffective. I think the problem runs deeper with me, and therefore requires a more extensive solution. I think the key is in changing my perceptions, my expectations, and learning how to pause and really relax. “So what if she pees? Clean it up and move on.” “The kids left their toys all over the couch? Calmly and firmly ask them to put them away.” If I practice these kinds of attitudes throughout the day, practice them in moments of calm, then they become second nature when the calm suddenly turns to chaos. The result? A saner me. One who deals with the issue at hand, rather than reacting to it.

So, here’s to a new beginning. A saner me. Go forth and be sane 🙂

Decluttering, Memories, Music

Hippy Days

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I’ve been de-cluttering lately. Feels good to get rid of things. It’s good preparation for if we ever move to a new house. Which I hope we do, eventually. I finally went through the box of stuff that my former co-workers packed up for me when I lost my hearing and left work. That sounds like they were anxious for me to be gone, but really they were getting ready to move to a new building, so it had to be done. I found a lot of good stuff in there, pictures from when the kids were younger, my ipod and speakers, my notary stamp, even some herbal tea bags.

I’m enjoying a cup of tea right now, of a flavor I had not tried before. I’m sure it was one a coworker gave me to try. Orange spice black tea. It’s actually quite yummy. As soon as the scent hit my nose it brought me back to my hippy days. And not the ones I spent stoned. It was after that, when I first moved to Lansing. I did hippy things (I suppose, not having lived during the true hippy era) like walking around the campus of MSU wearing sandals with fuzzy socks and long skirts, or drinking coffee at Bilbo’s until the wee hours, playing crazy silly songs on the jukebox (Cibo Matto, do you know your chicken?). I used to shop for tapes and CDs at the campus music store (two of which I found recently, but have no way to play, or listen to, really). I had a roommate who introduced me to house plants and egg noodles (the egg noodle craze lasting much longer than the plants, as I have a hard time keeping green things alive). I went to local concerts, camped out on lawns, and danced crazy dances. It was truly a carefree time for me, which I suppose is where the hippy reference fits best.

I also did some pretty stupid things in those days, even after giving up smoking pot and drinking. I used to take off driving and get myself lost, just so I could find my way home again. When I lived downtown I very often walked around alone. On Independence Day I walked half a dozen blocks to sit on a hill to watch the fireworks. Alone. And this was 1997, so I had no cell phone. Then there was the time I considered buying a VW bus from a guy I met at the laundromat, so I took the bus for a test drive, with the stranger dude riding along. Not smart.

Hmm. That train of thought took an unexpected turn. It’s good to remember happy times from the past, but I guess it’s also just as good to recognize some of the stupid things we’ve done, and be thankful we lived through them. God often keeps us safe despite ourselves, doesn’t he?

Decluttering, Miracles do happen

Removing Distractions

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I’ve been feeling numb lately. Uninspired, lacking passion, boring even. And as I sit and contemplate why that is, I come up with a train of thought. The first car on the train being that I have not been praying on a consistent basis, and that leads to shallow prayers lacking meaning and purpose. Inconsistent and shallow prayers lead to inconsistent reading of Scripture, so I’m not talking to God, and He’s not talking to me (or I’m not listening).

Now, my main desire for starting this blog was to encourage and inspire people. I can’t do that if I’m only writing about the mundane details of life (though I know you love hearing about my housekeeping habits).

But, I digress. Back to the train. There is no meaningful conversation happening between me and God, and I am uninspired. Why is this? Because I am distracted. What is distracting me? Stupid Facebook games. There it is. I confess. And if I were truly, honestly confessing to you, I would share that today I spent a solid three hours playing Candy Crush and Farmville 2. Without getting up. And it didn’t end there. I did manage to get some things done, but always came back to the games. Because, “just one more” is a lie, folks. It never happens. This is an addiction, and the only way to beat it is to turn away. I have decided to stop playing altogether as of just before I started writing this post, but I’m honestly still arguing with myself about whether I “need” to un-install the damn things. And I think that’s the proof right there. They need to go.

What will I do to fill my down time? I don’t know, read, crochet, de-clutter the junk hiding in my closets and drawers? Or I could walk, practice hearing on the phone, write a note to a friend. That’s quite a list right there, and all of those things are things I would be happy to do. Correction: WILL be happy to do. Because starting tomorrow, the games are gone. Yup, I need to un-install them. Going to do that right now…

… okay, I did it! Wait, gotta remove Candy Crush from the phone and Kindle…

… okay, now I’m done. Games are gone.

I hope you know I’m doing this for you. I just hope it’s worth it. I’m gonna go cry myself to sleep now.

Cochlear implant, Decluttering, Kids, Multiple Sclerosis

Grandma Deb

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I had a heck of a week last week. All good. My mom was visiting from Oklahoma, and it was wonderful to spend time with her. On normal days we Skype, so it was refreshing to have real interaction. She came with me to my audiologist appointment, and then we went shopping and had lunch afterwards. That was Monday, when the kids are at daycare. We had the kids home the rest of the week, which changed everything. The kids had a great time with Grandma Deb, and she took them to Jumpin’ Jax (a local bounce-house playground type thing). She also got to see Luke play baseball, and we did some shopping for yarn so I can make afghans for the kids. She helped me sort through Natalie’s clothes for the items that no longer fit, and then took us to Goodwill to drop off a whole trunk load of stuff we no longer wanted.

So while we got a lot of work done around the house, we also had a lot of fun as well. We never did get to decluttering that damn hall closet. Oh well. I’ll get it handled eventually.

I have always been close with my mom, so it makes me happy to see the kids connecting with her so well. They each have a lot of her character in them, and it’s even more apparent to me when she’s around. Natalie has her artistic streak, loving drawing, coloring, and dancing; Luke has her creative problem solving abilities.

When we first planned this visit we expected that I would need more help, but I think we were both surprised at how well I was doing, especially with the kids. I was able to show Mom how well I can hear the kids now that I’m getting used to the cochlear implant, and also how well the kids were adjusting to it. I will always be making adjustments, but we’re headed in the right direction.

By the end of the week, I was pretty fatigued. Partly because of all the work we did, but partly because I was due for my monthly Tysabri infusion. It’s the medicine I take to manage and hopefully slow down the progression of multiple sclerosis. I noticed a few months back that I get more and more tired leading up to the next infusion. So, three weeks of fairly normal energy levels, and one week of rapidly progressing fatigue. It’s good that I can recognize this, so I’m not feeling hopelessly frustrated to be so doggone tired for no good reason. It’s unfortunate that Mom happened to be here on that fourth week of fatigue, but in a way I’m grateful, because she was happy to help and quick to recognize when I needed to rest. And, being my mother, she is not shy about telling me to take a nap when I need it.

All in all, it was a great week. Summer is flying by, and the kids will be back to school in no time. We plan to continue to enjoy every moment we are given, and thank God for all the blessings. Carpe diem!

Decluttering, Kids, Memories

Tripping down Memory Lane and stuff

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Today marks the first official day of summer break, since both my kids are out of school. Of course, it’s Monday so they are at daycare, which makes it strange, but nice. We decided to only send them to daycare on Mondays, which still gives them play time with their friends, and gives me a much needed, uninterrupted start to the week. A planning day, if you will. My to-do list is pretty much the same as usual; water flowers, sweep floors, clean kitchen, clean bathrooms. I added ‘purge emails’ to the list because I have over 1000 emails stored and I think it’s the reason my phone keeps telling me my memory is full. And when that happens, no texts come in or go out, and it’s frustrating. So I am widdling away at it.

I have emails as far back as 2007, so it will take some time. I don’t know why they are all still there, I think a good portion of them are emails I sent that are now in gmail folders I had set up for automated categorizing (seemed like a good idea at the time). But I don’t lead an FPU class anymore, and I’m not preparing tax returns, so all of that can go. Most of it is junk. Amazon purchase confirmations from free apps I downloaded for the kids on my Kindle, stuff like that. Some of it I’ve found so far has been interesting to read, however. Notes of encouragement I sent to friends, sending thank you messages to people who helped me in one way or another. Notes to friends just to say hi because it had been too long. It’s interesting to read these words I wrote so long ago, because my recollection is that I was a terrible, neglectful friend, who was too busy with my own life to reach out to others. But these emails scattered over the years tell me that those recollections are not all true.

It’s funny how our memories fail us, don’t you think? I think it’s good to look back sometimes. I have forgotten so much, but stuff like those emails serve to remind me of the good that I forgot. I have a great husband and great friends who do the same for me. They’ll remind me of something that happened, or a prayer that had been answered, and it feels so refreshing when the memory comes flooding back. I thank God for those moments, for those people.

Do you have a good memory that you’ve recently been reminded of?